Who Is Running You?
How little you is running adult you
Feeling abandoned and alone in this world is a very common experience, and a very powerful motivator. Most people didn’t get the love they would have liked, how they would have liked it, at some point in their life. It is the lack of loving that, left unfilled, can become a powerful unconscious motivator in our lives. It can keep us in relationships that are unhealthy, unfulfilling, and even abusive.
The good news is that you hold the key to your own healing. You can tap into the great reservoir of loving that is within you, and apply that salve to the wounds which haven’t healed. There are even practical ways in which you can do this.
It is always such an amazing process to watch someone tap into the deeper emotions and see that energy come to the surface as a release. When someone really gets to the deeper wounds there is a rawness and recognition of the authenticity of that pain, and just releasing that energy alone can produce a healing especially when followed up with loving.
There may still be a younger version of you that is running the adult version of you. This one may think that it is alone in this scary world. It may feel unloved, or unworthy. That the universe or God is a punishing one, and that this is an unfriendly world. These are all frameworks through which we see the world based on how we interpreted this lack of loving.
Maturing those parts of yourself that are still stuck in those childish interpretations of the world and of your past is not a job for the faint of heart, because you first have to be willing to look at the pain and all the darkness. Once you look at it you have to love it.
When you become aware of or tap into those hurts, one technique is to speak to the younger version of you, telling yourself those things you would have needed to hear from your parents or other close relationships. It can help to put your hands on your heart and stomach. You can tell that one that you are there for him/her, that he/she is loved, that it is going to be okay, etc. Most importantly, speak to that one with caring and loving.
This technique and others, such as giving the little one a voice, can start to heal those places where old wounds may still be open, and can shift how you see the world, and change those unconscious patterns that are running you. These types of exercises are often best when facilitated by someone who understands how to guide you on this journey.
We want others to be there for us, but we won’t be there for ourselves. We want others to love us, but we don’t love ourselves.
We often try to change our patterns through our own willpower, only to find that we somehow end up in the same situation. That’s like thinking that repainting a car will fix the engine troubles. We all know that would be ridiculous, but when it comes to the patterns that run us, we think we can just fix our outer choices and somehow that will fix the inner issues that are motivating us.
We try to wish away the feelings we have, because we know they aren’t serving us. I wish it worked like that, but it just doesn’t. It works how it works.
Applying loving to the hurts you’ve experienced is the way that healing works. We change the outer by healing the inner.
This is one of the primary aspects to my work, and is a way to experience greater fulfillment in your life and relationships.
If you are interested in finding out more about working with Nat, respond to this newsletter or visit his website transcend.online